Well this week at my Apples of Gold meeting, it was about loving your kids. I truly needed it this week. Some days I feel like the worst mother. I either feel bad about :
-yelling to much, I really really need to work on this. I really have a big, loud mouth!
- not playing with them enough. I really try to make their day fun and interesting but I can only play tag so much or read a story so many times, or play a game so many times.
-sometimes I feel guily because I stay at home. I mean, maybe they want to play with other kids rather than me and I already told you about her horrible "friend" next door, so maybe they would have fun at a day care? Also, then we would have a lot more money to spend on nonsense stuff.
- the time we do spend playing, I end up feeling guily because its not educational enough.
- as I mentioned, Im ALWAYS tired, I feel guilty about this too.
All these things add up and I feel emotionally and physically exhausted at the end of the day. I realized that my kids have NEVER had a babysitter! Other than grandparents, theyve only ever been with me! Thats crazy! I think my parents would have left us with a homeless bum back when my sister and I were their age.
Ive also never been away from them for more than 2 days. I feel aways that sometimes I just want to not see them for at least a week. 2 days sometimes hardly feels like enough.
This is why I wanted to be thankful for my girls today. Because I realize that motherhood is one big ball of guilt, I am so thankful that I have this to feel guilty about!
Im thankful for their little voices, their little smiles, their little hands, their little eyelashes, the way the say "I love you mommy," the way they cry for me when I leave, the way they laugh, the way they dance, they way the care about others....I could go on and on!
What are you thankful for today?